Monday, May 26, 2014


James came in my room to visit me while I was taking it easy.   I thought it was cute how he put his shirt on over his p.j.s.

Another cute visitor, Wesley.


Aubryn talking to Eden.


Aubryn burping Eden.


Wide awake


Life is hard work!

Sisters!

Sunday, May 25, 2014

Baby Eden with Aubryn


The birth story of Eden Esther Hawks

Baby was "due" May 11th, 2014, Mother's Day.  One week later it was Sunday the 18th and I was still pregnant.  I went to church and taught my last Temple prep class for the series. This baby must have known I needed to finish the class.   I knew that if I went past 11:14pm that night it would be my longest pregnancy.  I was emotional at church.  I heard lots of advice on how to go into labor.  I took it all in stride.  People meant well.  I was not really worried.  I knew she would come when it was the right time.  My body would be ready and she would be ready.  That night Brian and I went on a walk alone.  When we got home I took a steamy shower to help my annoying cough that I had been dealing with for a month to loosen up.  I went to bed with plans to get up and do laundry and fix my hair.

At 3am I woke up to a strange feeling in my abdomen.  I laid there and thought it might have been a contraction.  I got up and went to the bathroom.  Nothing new.  Went back to bed.  I would have a contraction again.  Not to intense, but more than the light ones I had been having here and there for weeks.  I tried to time them.  Some were ten minutes apart, some three.  Some weak, some stronger.  I stayed in bed for an hour trying to sleep, watching the clock and hoping this was it.  I was thinking that if this was labor, then why are the contractions so inconsistent.   I wondered if she was in a good position.  But the contractions were low in front where they should be, so I didn't do anything about it.  At 4 am I decided to get up and move around a bit.  If this was labor, I would rather get it going before the kids were all up, but at the same time I wanted to let my birth team sleep as long as possible.  At 4:30 I woke Brian up.  The contractions were steadily coming and getting harder.  He called the Midwife and Doula.  They were on their way. 

I had planned on a water birth and really hoped to catch my baby this time.  I had fears that I would be alone.  I had fears that she would be in a difficult position.  I had filled my bathroom wall with positive affirmations and words of encouragement from friends.  In the time leading up to the birth I read these things often.  The positive affirmations helped me a TON!!

As I was standing in the bathroom and when I would have a contraction, Brian would rub my lower back and hips as I leaned on the counter.  That felt good and I wondered how he knew to do that.  Usually I would want my hips squeezed, but that didn't feel right this time and I never had to tell him.  He was filling the tub and getting it ready.  I would rotate between leaning on the counter and sitting on the toilet.  At one point as I leaned against the counter I felt her come down quite a bit.  I told Brian she is coming soon.  I told him she is moving down.  He called Chris and told her I was going to have the baby soon.  She said she was 2 minutes away.

I climbed in the tub and it seemed like no time at all she told me to reach down and feel my baby.  I remember thinking it was too early for her to be there.  But I felt her crowning.  I felt her head emerge.  I kept my fingers on her and felt as her shoulders slowly came out and then her body. I do not know if my eyes were open or closed because everything I "saw" at this time was through my hands.  It is hard to describe how this felt.  It was amazing to feel her body emerge from me.  I reached down with my other arm and lifted her up out of the water.  I had done it!  We had done it!  It was over.  I had never felt so aware during any of my births.  It was an amazing feeling and I was so happy to see her and know the journey of this pregnancy was over.  She was here and now we would begin our new journey together. The fears I had could finally be put behind me.  I loved seeing her stretch her legs and arms out.   The cord quit pulsating rather quickly and the placenta was delivered.  We kept the cord attached as the placenta sat in a bowl.  After I got out of the water and into bed we got Aubryn to come in and cut the cord.  It was more difficult than I think she thought it would be.  She was proud of herself and has enjoyed telling people her big role in the birth.  She also was taught all about the placenta by Chris.   Aubryn  loves to hold the baby and would do it all day if I let her.  She has been so good with her.

This was an amazing birth experience for me.  There is no way I can think of to improve it in any way.   Now it was done.  Everything was well!  Everyone was there that I needed!  I was able to catch my baby!  The birth went smoothly!   ALL IS WELL.
I just caught my own baby! Born at 5:05am


Brian was so happy


Aubryn cutting the cord



9lbs 2oz















"I yuv her"



















my affirmation wall