Life

Imagine what you did right before you came to earth. Those last few moments.  Ahhh!  Were you excited? Scared? Confident? Worried? Ready???  What were you saying to yourself?  “I’ve got this!  I can do this!  Here I go!!”  Or were you more hesitant and nervous, hoping you could do what was required to make it home?  Did we have ANY IDEA WHAT WE WERE IN FOR???  Did we know HOW HARD this was going to be?  Did we know the PAIN we would feel here?  Did we also know how wonderful it was going to be?  Did we know how amazing our bodies would be?  Did we know that we would meet really awesome people?  Did we know the JOY we would feel here?

What will it be like when our time here ends and we go to Paradise(hopefully!)?  Will there be regrets?  Questions we want answers to?  Shame?  Pleased with our work on the earth?  Will we feel accomplished or that we wasted our precious time here?

Today is the anniversary of Isaac’s death.  I have always hated this day!  I have dreaded it and wished it away every year.  I remember the horrible day that it was.  The memories are awful.  The feelings, mood, lighting, weather, sounds, all of it, are a living nightmare.

BUT what about this day through Isaac’s perspective?  He probably had some terrifying moments, maybe some sad moments as he said goodbye to us unknowingly, but then content peace and tremendous joy!  Freedom from his confining body!  I’m confident this was a beautiful day for him!  He had completed his mission on earth!  He had done all that he was sent here to do. He had done an extraordinary job!  He was greeted with LOVE!  I’m confident he was embraced by our Savior and told something like, “Well done, Isaac!!! I am so pleased with your work on the earth.” A WONDERFUL DAY FOR ISAAC, I’m sure!

I have felt a pull to make more out of my time, my PRECIOUS time here on earth.  I have been prompted to keep an eternal look about things.  I have been noticing, and more thankful for, my MANY blessings.  They are surrounding me!  I have been more aware of tender mercies.  God is aware and mindful of me and my family.  There is no doubt!  There is help along my journey here.    

Life is kind of like pregnancy.  (I have to go here.  Ha!  I can really relate to pregnancy.)  In the beginning we are super excited!!  Maybe nervous, too.  We aren’t sure what to expect or how hard this pregnancy will be.  As it progresses we start to feel a little more comfortable with what we are doing.  It is a reality.  We still get queasy, some more than others.  There are surprises.  Things we never expected to happen.  For me, one was heartburn. I had no idea what it was and that it was linked with the pregnancy.  

Through the middle of it, for most, it is smooth sailing.  We are feeling pretty good and enjoying it.  

Then it starts to get uncomfortable again.  We are achy.  We are tired.  We can’t walk.  It takes all our energy to accomplish regular things.  

We have to get to this point.  We have to get so miserable and uncomfortable that we are willing to do what it takes to be done with the pregnancy.  Some are more patient than others.   Some have had very difficult pregnancies.  Some are pregnant longer than others. Some pregnancies end early, or abruptly.  Some labors are drawn out, long, painful processes. Some labors are smooth and uncomplicated.  No matter, it always ends.  And, so does life.  

This life really is a test.  It is also a “class” or a series of “lessons”.  Always opportunities to grow, stretch, (like pregnancy) and learn new things.  Things we never imagined.  Stretched far beyond what we thought we were capable of.  It is hard.  I want to say harder than I expected, but I don’t truly know what I expected.  All I know was that I was WILLING.  I am here.  I will return.  I will report.