I parked the cart full of cleaning supplies, rags, and clean towels and sheets outside the door and I walked into the hotel room. It was dark. Not just because the curtains were shut, but also the feeling. I began my cleaning routine and the feeling only got worse. I saw men’s business clothes and items that clued me to the fact that he was a man traveling for business on this weekday. I made the bed and tidied up. There was alcohol and pornography. The room had an awful smell. I hurried. I wanted to leave the space. I had never met this guy, but I learned a lot about him just from cleaning up after him. He left behind a clear picture of who he was.
I moved on to another room that same day and discovered a completely different environment. While I could tell that this was another man away on business, the feeling in the room was much brighter. I don’t even remember if the curtain was open. On the table was a picture of a young family. There was not much else to notice. There were no messes, or smells. The feeling in the room was in stark contrast to the earlier room I had cleaned. This man also told me who he was without ever meeting him. He also exposed who he was without me ever knowing him.
What will people know of me after I leave? When my time is done on earth what impression will I leave? Will they know what I believed? Will they know what I stood for? Will they know how I treated people? Will they know who I loved? Will they be better for it?
When I was a little girl, I loved to play at my friend, Hillary’s, house. I ran there one day to play and really needed to go to the bathroom. I had learned from my mom not to place my hand between my legs when I needed to go. She told me that everyone knew I needed to use the bathroom when I did that! That was news to me! So, as I approached my friends house, I needed to figure out how to hold it without my hand. I decided to twist my legs as tightly together as I could. I rang the doorbell. Hillary’s mom answered.
“Can Hillary play?” I asked with a little bit of urgency.
“Do you need to go to the bathroom?” she asked me.
How did she know!!!? I hadn’t said anything! How did she know I needed to go to the bathroom?!
That was a huge learning moment for me. I know it seems silly. I also learned around that time that looking at people without actually turning my head to look at them, meant nothing as far as them not knowing I was looking at them. I had thought that if I kept my head facing forward, but turned my eyeballs to look at someone then they wouldn’t know I was watching them. The day that lady waved at me from the other church pew totally threw me off!
People can know things about you without you ever even saying it with words!
I have been thinking and pondering about people who walked through this life before me. Founding fathers of this country, pioneers, scripture figures, family, etc. They were not walking around in history any more than I am. They lived in their present. It was their life! Did they know I would know their name? Did they know I would read about them? Did they know I would learn about what they believed? Did they know I might walk where they walked? Did they know they would leave an impression on me? Did they know they would make a DIFFERENCE? Did they know they would motivate me to be better, by their good or bad? Did they know I would be grateful for them or disappointed? Did they know? Did they know?
Do I know? Who will know my name? Why? What am I leaving behind? What can be said about me?
When Brad was 3 or 4 years old we were walking through the cemetery where Isaac, his brother, was buried. As we walked over and around each headstone, Brad would ask, “Who is this person?” He wanted to know who they were and about them. He knew a truth at a young age that most never fully understand, that each of those markers was a life. A name. A person. Someone who had stories. A person who had loved ones. A person who left their own legacy. They existed! And now it is my turn.
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