Reflecting

Eden loves her babies!  She often struggles to hold them all.  She will hand them to others for help, but that doesn't last long and she wants it back.  She wants to take care of them all, all the time.  "Baby...Baby...Baby."  she says as she goes from baby to baby.  It reminds me of how I feel a lot of the time.  Too many kids, too little me.

I've been reflecting today.  Isaac died 12 years ago tomorrow, but it was a Sunday just like today.  It was sunny and cold.  The unique thing about this death anniversary is that for the first time I have a baby that IS 19 months old on the day he died.  That is how old Isaac was when he died.  Every time my babies are nineteen months old, I get nervous.  I know it isn't logical.  I also get nervous when his death date comes around.  When the air is crisp and cold.  This time I get both together.

I am thankful for the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  I know God lives.  I know he loves us.  I love my babies!  I never would have imagined that I would go on to have six more after his death.  It is challenging, but they are blessings.  Life is hard.  Really.  I know Heavenly Father is mindful of us and that he LOVES us!!!  There is peace that only He brings.